those little secrets
by momiiji
Summary: Sometimes, out of nostalgia, Hinata visits Yukigaoka Junior High just to check on things.


those little secrets | 1355 words | _originally posted for kagehinaexchange tumblr _

* * *

Sometimes, out of nostalgia, Hinata visits Yukigaoka Junior High just to check on things.

Trivial ones, mostly. Has the old garderner's back healed? Is the school cafeteria still selling tasteless cheese breads? Does Kobayakawa-sensei still forget to zip his fly after coming out from the toilet? That _kouhai _girl, what's her name, she used to follow him around silently thinking that he never noticed but of course he did, and come to think of it, she was rather cute, wasn't she—ah, Haru-chan, that's her name, is she doing well?

He once told himself that he would only return when he becomes the Little Giant, when he has all the television interview clips and newspaper articles and trophies to show, but that seems so far away that restrain feels unnecessary. The more he practises, the closer he is, and yet the closer he is, the wider the gap becomes.

So he makes each visit a milestone check. The first time was a few weeks after starting high school. _It's funny that I had to meet Kageyama, and it has been a rough journey, but I finally made Kageyama toss to me. _

Then it was a few weeks later, _I think I'm starting to get used to having a team, an actual team, to practise with_, and that time, Haru-chan spotted him. She was too startled to say anything other than his name before dashing off, but it was thanks to her that Hinata realised that it was useless, all these visits he was thinking of doing, if they would mean nothing.

That's why the next time he comes, it would be when he has grabbed a trophy.

_It will be our little secret,_ he whispers as he cycles away.

* * *

Karasuno reminds him a lot of Yukigaoka in a lot of strange ways. The warmth of camaraderie, the scent of innocence; Kenma told him it isn't much about Yukigaoka or Karuno but the city they grew up itself that lends to both schools' charm. Kenma said he kind of sort of likes it here in the Miyagi Prefecture, even when the data reception can get rather upsetting that he had to lose a few mobile games.

Hinata likes Kenma a lot. He's a lot like him, yet not a lot like him. He tells Kenma that through a text message, Kenma's reply is that he could probably find everyone to be a little like him; Hinata thinks that he kind of sort of has a point.

Then Kageyama too must be a little like him—he must be, didn't the captain once say something about them being two peas in a pod? Noya-san must be a lot, a lot like him, and it makes him happy, because Noya-san is super awesome in the awesome way, in fact he's just as awesome as Asahi-san. Since Tanaka-san is very much like Noya-san, therefore Tanaka-san must be a lot like Hinata. The captain too, though it's a little hard to see at this point. Likewise with Sugawara-san; Hinata really likes Sugawara-san. Tsukishima though, that's a tricker one, but as long as he stays in the team, he knows that he would grow to like Tsukishima someday. He's way too tall, way too intimidating, but they'll come to like each other, he's sure. That's not all, because there's Ennoshita-sempai, Yamaguchi, all the real team members who know volleyball, all the people who could make him fly.

Especially Kageyama. Someone so much taller than he is, someone who could fly so high up above, yet chose to be Hinata's wings.

Yukigaoka perhaps isn't very much like Karasuno, but Yukigaoka is why he's in Karasuno.

_You know, Shouyou, you should probably tell Kageyama that you like him too,_ Kenma texts.

_Like how I like you?_

_Like how you like him. _

_Then shouldn't I also tell it to everyone? _

Kenma becomes really quiet after that, and it unsettles Hinata a little. Kenma replies text messages at the speed of light, and when he doesn't, things are bound to be strange. It's like seeing Kageyama smile for no reason, or Tanaka-san brooding alone, or Noya-san getting angry, the list could go on and on forever.

_Sorry_, Kenma finally texts back a few hours later in the middle of the night (up playing games, most likely), _I thought Kageyama is special. Kuro said I shouldn't make assumptions. _

For some reason, Hinata doesn't seem to feel like Kenma was wrong.

_Maybe he is. _

_Really? I knew I was right. Should tell Kuro that he owes me steak now. _

_It's our little secret. Come again if you wanna know more. _

_I heard that you guys are coming here instead. _

Hinata is already too sleepy to be really excited, but he manages to at least read the next text from Kenma.

_Sorry, shouldn't have said that. You didn't hear it from me. Can this be also our little secret?_

* * *

Hinata can't help grinning at Kageyama sometimes, because he kind of looks dumb when he gets a little carried away with looking aloof, and it's not like he intended it but it's just in his nature to be get obliviously carried away and Hinata supposes that it's what makes Kageyama _Kageyama_, the dark little puppy with all barks and no bites.

Unless, of course, when he steps into the court with his teeth bared open and the dark little puppy becomes a ferocious wolf. Hinata likes this part of him, the part that makes him shrivel when he played against him once upon a time and breathe with relief when they play together. For all the determination he managed to store up during that few months after their first match together until they met again in Karasuno, Hinata realised that he had never really wanted to beat him, not really.

Was it because he had always really been alone back in Yukigaoka, when he was the power but not the drive that made the nonexistent Volleyball Club a reality, even if it was merely for a match? Was it because he was never playing in a team, always just him and people who were making up the numbers?

Kageyama too, he must had been wondering, hadn't he? Wasn't he pretty much nearing his fall when they met in that match, the king that was barely holding on to his crown? Sometimes Hinata did wonder if, in Kageyama's moments of descent, the thought of him and their match ever crossed his mind. Had he ever wanted to beat Hinata too, the same way Hinata was obsessed with the thought of being Kageyama's rival?

Then there's a shadow looming above, and Kageyama gives him a look that is both threatening and interrogating, _did you eat something bad today, what the hell are you doing curling up down there? _

Hinata likes him alright. Him and that condescending voice of his, those almight tosses of his, those frowns on his face, and more than just _liking_—and Hinata thinks he's slowly figuring out—it's like with Kageyama, he _gets _him. He doesn't like Kageyama the way he likes Kenma for example, or the way he likes Noya-san, Tanaka-san, everyone else.

Kageyama is just that, Kageyama, and they were meant to find each other, somewhat. At least Hinata feels like he's meant to find Kageyama anyway, the person who became his team member long before Karasuno came.

The one who found him, sort of, at least the one who first saw his wings. The one idiot who probably loves volleyball as much as he does. The one who could read him like a book, the one whom he could read.

Hinata could launch himself into the sky, but Kageyama, he's the one who would make him soar.

It's his little secret, for now.


End file.
